Day 2

Today's outfit is what I wish I had a closet full of. Skirt is just the right length, fit, and texture. Denim jacket gives just enough interest to the look to keep it, well...interesting. Right now though, I'm still struggling to replace my wardrobe. What seemed perfect last year just doesn't cut it anymore. Too short. Too tight. Too something not quite right. And I barely owned any skirts or dresses in the last five years. I'm slowly finding my way to a comfortable wardrobe, one trip to Goodwill at a time. There's just no money for a brand new look. Yet again, learning to be content.

In theory, I like the idea of a uniform. A closet full of long sleeve T-shirts and denim jumpers. The exact same headcovering in different colors. It sounds good in theory. Further discourage my vanity. But my husband likes variety, and I still do, too. I would like to narrow my options, though. Stick to a general area of basics. I'm still trying to find what's most comfortable, affordable, and genuine.

I love trips to the monastery, especially on a feast day. I was at a particular feast in August that struck me. The gathered pilgrims were waiting in an outdoor pavilion for the Liturgy to begin. In the distance, the priests began to process from another building, led by the nuns singing the Troparion. It took my breath away. The look of them. All dressed exactly the same, yet so unique. Their individuality shone through. They didn't blend in because of their similar dress. Rather, their special and separate personalities had the chance to shine through more distinctly. They were not "the lady with the blonde hair", "the one in the red shirt", or a myriad of other labels. Anyone in their presence was able to see them for who they were, because the observer was no longer distracted by meaningless appearances. Modest dress serves its purpose well. It takes the eye deeper, into the soul of the other human being. No more stumbling against the wall of bare skin. It's an invitation to go under the surface. See me for who I am inside.

I love the face of a nun. The glow. I know my headcovering doesn't automatically give me that. I may dress the part sometimes, but I still have a lot of work to do. You have to earn holiness. If I can just be a fraction of the person I dress like. That's what I pray for. What I commit to each day. Just a little bit like that person.

My headcovering today is a funny mix of styles. Well, at least it's funny to me. The scarves are two hijabs from HijabGirl. I tied them in the Butterfly Style from Tznius. Muslim scarves tied in an Orthodox Jewish style on an Orthodox Christian woman. I find that kinda funny. (I know, I'm easily entertained.) I like moments like this when I feel commradarie with my fellow headcoverers of all faiths. It's why I always smile at the Muslim women in the grocery store. A look just to say, "Hey, I can't really go there with you on all your beliefs, but this...this I understand. And I'm glad we have it in common."

I worked my tail off cleaning today, volunteering at the food pantry I coordinate, and hosting our parish crochet group. All of this while wearing pantyhose. It can be done. Actually, I move better in skirts. Much more room to maneuver in. It's a lie we tell ourselves that pants are more comfortable. Sure, doing everything in a skirt takes some getting used to, but that's not the skirt's fault. It's because we're used to something different. We're all just creatures of habit.